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We have -
Moved To:
http://professor-howdy.blogspot.com/















The E.Newspaper
By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D.
A.P.E., N.U.T.

************************
Check Out Comments -
Humor + Letters From Readers
Add Something Yourself
************************

Saturday

 

Letter To Howdy

.
The image “http://www.firstquadrant.org/imgs/girl_thinking.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Dear Howdy,

I was going through the internet and came across your
webpage and
thought it was interesting to see that there
are still people left in the
world with a sense of humor.

I love to have fun and at the same time not
over do it.
I spend my free time writing poems but am not that good
at
jokes but nevertheless appreciate a good one. I am in
my final year in
high school and the captain of the school
team. My ambitions are to
become a pro-player and a civil
engineer. I want to study in the U.S.
and i think if i have that
opportunity i would chose YALE. I haven't
seen your prospectus
yet but hope to. Any way i think your web page is
great.

Constance L.








 

Another Letter

.


Howdy,
Thanks for brightening up my day.
Another professor








 

Trouble At Sea

.


A lifeboat was called out to rescue a yacht in trouble.

The coast guard, trying to get the yacht's location,
called it on the radio. "What is your position?
Repeat, what is your position?"

And the reply came back, "My position - well I'm
a Professor at UNC."








 

Howdy's Raise







 

TABLE TENNIS OR PING-PONG?

.


The game of ping-pong, also known as table tennis, was a direct
offshoot of the English outdoor game of lawn tennis, itself derived
from traditional tennis, which is played on a hard court.

Improvised versions of table tennis were probably played in England
in the 1880s. There is a rumor that the very first games were played
with cigar box lids for paddles, carved champagne corks for balls,
and a row of upended books for a divider in the center of the court.

The first commercial version of table tennis was a game called
"Gossima" which was registered in 1891 in England, although no

physical evidence remains that actual Gossima sets were ever
produced. A similar game called "Gossima or Ping-Pong" is known
from
just before 1900. But it was not until 1902, with the publication
of
a book called "Table Tennis and How to Play It" that the game became
widely known.

The history of ping-pong: HERE!!!







 

Home On The Range

.


Two buffalo were standing on the range when a passing tourist said:
"Those are the mangiest, scroungiest, most moth-eaten miserable
beasts I have ever seen."

One of the buffalo turned to the other and said: "I think I just
heard a discouraging word."








 

On This Date - 1945

.


August 6, 1945 - Hiroshima was bombed by order
of President Harry Truman. When criticized some
time afterwards by the Mayor of that city he sent
this reply: "Had there been no attack on Pearl Harbor -
it would not have been necessary to drop the bomb."



It is estimated that the nuclear weapon (as horrible
as it was)
saved the lives of 1 million Americans soldiers
& 2 million Japanese lives had there been
the need for an
invasion to end the war.


The image “http://www.stg.brown.edu/projects/WWII_Women/TimeLine/PearlHarbor.gif” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.






Friday

 

A Letter


.

Dear Howdy ,

I really enjoy this newsletter - it is one of the best,
probably the best.
I wanted to reiterate that I wish
to keep getting the newletter and to
let you know
just how great I think it is.


Sincerely,

Lynne Kay






 

CyberWaste







 

TeamWork







 

New Wife

.


A man asked his new wife who recently graduated from
UNC if she had seen this morning's paper. She said,
"Yes,
I wrapped the garbage in it -- just the classified
section,
though."

He said, "But...but...I haven't seen it yet!"

She replied, "Oh, you didn't miss much. Just some egg
shells, coffee grounds and a few orange peels."








 

Cow Family







 

A Very Large Brown Bear

.


A brown bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender,
"I'll have a root....................................beer."

The Bartender says, "What's with the big pause?"

The bear answers, "I don't know. My father had them, too!"






 

A Riddle

.


In the land of Liars and Truthtellers there were two
families a little different from the general population.
The Smith's, who told the truth only in the morning
and
lie in the afternoon, and the Jones' who speak
the truth
only in the afternoon and lie in the morning.

You meet one person from each of these families on
the
street but you are not sure which is which. They
make
the following statements:

A: It is afternoon
B: My last name is Jones.

Who is who, and is it morning or afternoon?

Answer HERE!!!











 

Community Service

.


One day a State Trooper was pulling off an expressway near
UNC. When he turned onto the street at the end of the
ramp, he noticed someone at a chicken place getting into
his car. The driver placed the bucket of chicken on top of
his car, got in and drove off with the bucket still on top
of his car.

So the trooper decides to pull him over and perform a
community service by giving the driver his chicken. So
he pulled him over, walked up to the car, pulled the bucket

off the roof and offered it to the driver. The driver looks
at the trooper and says, "No thanks, I just bought some."






 

How Much Are You Worth???

.


Ever wonder how much you're worth? Well, we know all humans
are priceless, but seriously, ever wonder how much money
the elements found in your body are worth?



Well...when we total the monetary value of the elements in our
bodies and the value of the average person's skin, we arrive
at a net worth of $4.50!



This value is, however, subject to change, due to stock market
fluctuations. Since the studies leading to this conclusion
were conducted by the U.S. and by Japan respectively, it might
be wise to consult the New York Stock Exchange and the Nikkei
Index before deciding when to sell!



The U.S. Bureau of Chemistry and Soils invested many a hard-
earned tax dollar in calculating the chemical and mineral
composition of the human body, which breaks down as follows:



65% Oxygen
18% Carbon
10% Hydrogen
3% Nitrogen
1.5% Calcium
1% Phosphorous
0.35% Potassium
0.25% Sulfur
0.15% Sodium
0.15% Chlorine
0.05% Magnesium
0.0004% Iron
0.00004% Iodine



Additionally, it was discovered that our bodies contain trace
quantities of fluorine, silicon, manganese, zinc, copper,
aluminum, and arsenic. Together, all of the above amounts to
less than one dollar!



Our most valuable asset is our skin, which the Japanese
invested their time and money in measuring. The method the
Imperial State Institute for Nutrition at Tokyo developed
for measuring the amount of a person's skin is to take a
naked person, and to apply a strong, thin paper to every
surface of his body. After the paper dries, they carefully
remove it, cut it into small pieces, and painstakingly total
the person's measurements. Cut and dried, the average person
is the proud owner of fourteen to eighteen square feet of
skin, with the variations. Basing the skin's value on the
selling price of cowhide, which is approximately $.25 per
square foot, the value of an average person's skin is about
$3.50.




You have searched me and known me. You know my sitting down and my rising
up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path and my lying
down, And are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word on my
tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. You have hedged me
behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too
wonderful for me; It is high, I cannot attain it.

Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If
I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You
are there. If I take the wings of the morning, And dwell in the uttermost
parts of the sea, Even there Your hand shall lead me, And Your right hand
shall hold me. If I say, "Surely the darkness shall fall on me," Even the
night shall be light about me; Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You,
But the night shines as the day; The darkness and the light are both alike
to You. For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother's womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are
Your works, And that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from
You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts
of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your
book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there
were none of them.






 

Dr. Stanley Fish -
Duke University

.


If "universal absolutes" are "illusory," how can they be the best way
to teach Duke
University students to write proper English?



Isn't it interesting how the practical, everyday situations we all face show us
what is reality and what is really just illusion? When the rubber meets the
road, even one of our leading postmodernists has to admit that there just
might
be something to those universal, absolute truths he spent his entire
professional career denouncing. The problem with a false worldview, you
see, is
that you cannot live with it.

MORE!!!








 

Cyber-Prof

.


OFFICE HOURS
by Prof J. Budziszewski

Sarah's professors tell her there's no such thing as absolute truth.
Theophilus says even they don't really believe that.

MORE!!!















* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That H Enjoys" Below * * *

* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That Howdy Enjoys" Below * * *

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Jesus and The Da Vinci Code

How Can I Know God???

Tales of Narnia

Answering Islam

The Da Vinci Code

A Short Look At Six World Religions

Bible - God's Word in different languages...

Bible Study Info

Christian Web Info

Don't Be Left Behind

For The University Crowd

Hard Questions Answered

How to become a Christian

Mr. Contoversial

Great For Kids

Stories For Kids

Bible Knowledge Challenge

The Young Earth Club

Who Is Jesus???

Christian Apologetics

Christian Web Info

God Bless The USA

Great Christians In History

History of American Christianity

Bible Instructions

RBC

Dr. Ben Haden

Bible Search Tools

Kids For Truth

Lincoln - A Christian

Mission To America

One Place For Learning

Our Daily Bread

President Lincoln

Red Skelton's Pledge of Allegiance

Intellectual Takeout

Evangelical Viewpoint

Dr. John Vernon McGee

Insight For Living

Turning Point

Outstanding Bible Teacher

Dr. Tony Evans

Listen To The Bible

Is Jesus God?

Great Bible Teaching

*America - Why I Love Her - Big John Wayne*

The Church & Israel

How To Become A Christian

*Watch The Jesus Movie*

Fireworks

Your very own library

Muhammad or Jesus???

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 1

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 2

Christian Women

Is Jesus God?

Statement Of What Howdy Believes!!!

Bible Crosswords

Great Bible Teacher

All About Cults

Religion Comparison

The Relationship of the Church to Israel

Just For Guys

Church History

***Watch The Jesus Movie***
{Many Languages}





Music That Ho Enjoys



God Bless America - Kate Smith

Military Music

Boston Pops: God Bless America

This Land Is Your Land

Blue Moon

Say A Prayer

Hawaii Five O

LawOrder

The Battle Of New Orleans

Beverly Hillbillies

Indiana Jones

James Bond

Jaws

Magnum

Mission Impossible

Peter Gunn

Rocky

Singing In The Rain

Star Wars

Top Gun

Peggy Sue

Downtown

Elvis

Chuck Berry

Rock Around The Clock

Dueling Guitars

Blueberry Hill

A Taste Of Honey - clip

(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco - clip

Take The 'A' Train - clip

Hello, Dolly! - clip

Peggy Sue - clip

Theme From Peter Gunn - clip

Song from Moulin Rouge

Malagueña

Ebb Tide

Tara's Theme from Gone with the Wind

Around the World in 80 Days

Breakfast at Tiffany's

Charade

The Way We Were

You Do Something to Me

SWonderful

Adios

A Foggy Day

Amor

Anna

Arrivederci Roma

Theme from Moulin Rouge II

Stardust - Big Band

Bolero

Brazil

Rhapsody in Blue

Sleepy Lagoon

My Foolish Heart

Lisbon Antigua

La Mer

April in Portugal

Because of You

Poor People of Paris

Unchained Melody

Stranger on the Shore

Solace

Maple Leaf Rag

Voices of Spring

Emperor Waltz

Radetzky March

Water Music (Excerpt) George Frideric Handel

Finale - William Tell Overture

Overture - My Fair Lady

The Rain in Spain

The Lonely Bull - Herb Alpert

Tijuana Taxi - Herb Alpert

The Happy Whistler

So Rare

Mona Lisa

Ghost Riders in the Sky

Walk, Don't Run

Wonderland by Night

Canadian Sunset

Blue Tango

The Happy Wanderer

Down Yonder

Midnight in Moscow

Crazy Medley

Tequila

That's for Me

Quiet Village

Harbor Lights

Dueling Banjoes II

Autumn Leaves

My Foolish Heart

Don't Know Much

I WALK THE LINE

EL PASO

TENNESSEE WALTZ

STAND BY YOUR MAN

ON THE ROAD AGAIN

Close To You

Rainy Days & Mondays

Sing A Song

Yesterday Once More

We've Only Just Begun

Goodbye To Love

Only You

As Time Goes By

As Time Goes By II

As Time Goes By - Original

After Loving

San Francisco

Stranger In Paradise

Mrs. Howdy

Rags To Riches

The Good Life

Hello Dolly

All Of Me

Thank Heaven For Little Girls

Beyond The Sea

Everybody Loves

Return To Me

That's Amore

Autumn Leaves

Love Me With All Your Heart

If I Give My Heart To You

Autumn Leaves II

Autumn Leaves III

See The USA

My Prayer

You Always Hurt

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

Love Me Tender

Its Now Or Never

Old Shep

Dont Be Cruel

When I Fall In Love

When I Fall In Love II

When I Fall In Love III

A Fool Such As I

You'll Never Know

Fascination

I'm Yours

Wish You Were Here

Lady Of Spain

CanadianSunset

It's Magic

Secret Love

This Magic Moment

My Prayer

Twilight Time

Great Pretender

Harbor Lights

Little Darlin'

Wanted

No Other Love

Magic Moments

Till The End Of Time

Dont Let The Stars

Overture - Barber of Seville

Back In The Saddle

You Always Hurt

When I Fall

When A Man

True Love

Sincerely

Sweetheart

In The Mood

A Taste Of Honey

The Lonely Bull

Lollipops And Roses

This Guys In Love With You

What Now My Love

Three Coins In The Fountain

You've Gotta Have Heart

HeartOfMyHeart

Stranger In Paradise II

Love Is...

Unforgettable

Georgia On My Mind

Sentimental Over You

Thanks For The Memories

Too Young

Because

Never On Sunday

Yellow Rose Of Texas

Windy

My Little Corner

Speak Low

Moments To Remember

HernandosHideaway

Be My Love

Embassy Waltz

Misty

A Certain Smile

Chances Are

Not For Me To Say

Stranger On The Shore

I'll Be Seeing You

Cherry Pink

Downtown

Moonlight Serenade

Last Date

Naughty Lady

Til I Kissed You

All I Have To Do Is Dream

Dixie Land Band

Ghost Riders In The Sky

The Happy Wanderer

Lollipops

Santa Catalina

Band Of Gold

Auld Lang Syne

The Wayward Wind

P.S. I Love You

Harbor Lights

Ebb Tide

Lime Light

Green Door

My Heart Cries

Down Yonder

Silvana Mangano Anna

Does Your Chewing Gum?

Grand Night For Singing

Purple People Eater

Orange Blossom Special

I'll Get By

'Til Then

Katie At UNC

Love Letters

As Time Goes By

Cheek To Cheek

Mission Impossible

The Way You Look Tonight

Frenesi

Glad To Be An American

Battle Hymn Of The Republic

How Great Thou Art

Have Thine Own Way

Beyond The Sunset

Amazing Grace

He's Got The Whole World

Peace In The Valley

How Great Thou Art II

Stars & Stripes Forever

Tennessee Waltz

Beverly Hillbillies Theme

El Paso

Happy Trails

Big John

Sixteen Tons

Which Doctor?

Wonderful! Wonderful!

Misty

Gina

The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Mr. Sandman

Bad Leroy

Only The Lonely

Pachelbel

Magnificent 7

Magnificent 7 - II

Rawhide

I Walk The Line


God loves you so much that He died for you!!!



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Verse of the Day




* * * Four important things to KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.




D I S C L A I M E R If someone should ask if it's legal to download songs
found on various non-commercial sites, such as this one.

Well, I'm neither a lawyer nor a technician,
and I've begun to wonder if it was legal for
us to tape music off the radio back when
tape recorders first came into being.

And were we committing a crime when we recorded
a movie shown on TV with our VCRs? And was it
really legal to buy a dual-deck recorder for the
express purpose of duplicating cassettes?

My answer to all of the above is, "I don't know."

Nonetheless, here is a formal statement in
some kind of legalize that appears to apply
to this kind of file availability:

The songs on this site are copyrighted by their respective artists and are placed here
for evaluation purposes only. No profits or sales are made on this site from their use.

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