.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}

We have -
Moved To:

The E.Newspaper
By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D.
A.P.E., N.U.T.

Check Out Comments -
Humor + Letters From Readers
Add Something Yourself



The Right Way To Spell Potato

If GH can stand for P as in Hiccough
If OUGH stands for O as in Dough
If PHTH stands for T as in Phthisis
If EIGH stands for A as in Neighbour
If TTE stands for T as in Gazette
If EAU stands for O as in Plateau
Then the right way to spell POTATO



Computer Dating

A UNC student gave up on Computing Dating
after she was stood up by two mainframes, a
mini, and a laptop.


Two UNC students are walking down different ends
of a street toward each other, and one is carrying a
sack. When they meet, one says,"Hey Tommy Ray,
what'cha got in th' bag?"
"Jus' some chickens."
"If I guesses how many they are, can I have one?"
"Shoot, ya guesses right and I'll give you both of them."
"OK. Ummmmm . . . five?"


When you write copy, you own the right of copyright to the copy you
write, if the copy is right. If, however, your copy falls over, you must
your copy. If you write religious services, you write rite, and own
right of copyright to the rite you write.

Conservatives write Right copy, and own the right of copyright, to the
Right copy they write. A right-wing cleric would write Right rite, and
owns the right of copyright to the Right rite he has the right to write.
editor has the job of making the Right rite copy right before the
copyright can be right.

Should Reverend Jim Wright decide to write Right rite, then Wright would
write right rite, to which Wright has the right of copyright. Duplicating
his rite would be to copy Wright's Right rite, and violate copyright, to
which Wright would have the right to right.



A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate your
relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law better
than I like mine!"


Parents are worried about the failing eyesight of
their two teenagers. The daughter can't find any -
thing to wear in a closet full of clothes and the son
can't find anything good to eat in a refrigerator full
of food.



Only a woman could ask, "Don't turn around -
but who is that couple that just came in?"


A police officer stops a UNC student for speeding and asks
her very
nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act
together. Just yesterday you take away my license and
today you expect me to show it to you."



This virus works on the honor system.

Please delete all the files on your hard disk, then forward
this message to everyone you know.

Thank you for your cooperation.



A married couple (both UNC grads) trying to live up to a snobbish
lifestyle went to a party. The conversation turned to Mozart.
"Absolutely brilliant, magnificent, a genius!"

The woman, wanting to join in the conversation, remarked
casually, "Ah, Mozart. You're so right. I love him. Only this
morning I saw him getting on the No. 5 bus going to Coney Island."

There was a sudden hush, and everyone looked at her. Her
husband was mortified. He pulled her away and whispered,
"We're leaving right now. Get your coat and let's get out of here."

As they drove home, he kept muttering to himself. Finally his
wife turned to him. "You're angry about something."

"Oh really? You noticed?" he sneered. "I've never been so
embarrassed in my life! You saw Mozart take the No. 5 bus to
Coney Island? You're crazy! Don't you know the No. 5 bus doesn't
go out to Coney Island?"


Things That Take Years To Learn

The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number
helicopters in it.

You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely
suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual
emerging from her at that moment.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age,
gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep
down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.

There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race
has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that
word would be "meetings."

The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is
annoy people who are not in them.

You should not confuse your career with your life.

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter/janitor,
not a nice person.



Did you hear about the lawyer hurt in an accident?

An ambulance stopped suddenly.


The problem with evolutionists isn't just that
they can't see God at work. It's that they refuse
to see Him at work.



Hey Y'all,

I'm going to be out of town Monday - Wednesday.
Wave if you pass me on the interstate.

'Til Then,
Dr. Howdy

P.S. Do you like my new car I purchased with
my tax return???

P.S.S. Read comments & archives for additional
humor & inspiration (if you happen to need some)
while I'm gone...





"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking.
We are sorry it is taking a little extra time to pull away
from the gate The machine that rips the handles off your
luggage is broken so we have to do it manually."



Professionals Define:
"What is a kiss?"

Here's how the professors of different subjects
define the same word, *kiss*, in different ways:

**Prof. of Algebra:
Kiss is infinity because two divided by nothing.

**Prof. of Geometry:
Kiss is the shortest distance between two lips.

**Prof. of Physics:
Kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the
expansion of the heart.

**Prof. of Chemistry:
Kiss is the reaction of the interaction between
two hearts.

**Prof. of Zoology:
Kiss is the interchange of salivary bacteria.

**Prof. of Dentistry:
Kiss is infectious and antiseptic.

The image “http://www.bossanova.com/weevil/kiss/kiss1.gif” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

**Prof. of Accountancy:
Kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned.

**Prof. of Economics:
Kiss is that thing for which the demand is always
higher than the supply.

**Prof. of English:
Kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction; it is
more common than proper; it is spoken in the plural
and it is applicable to all.

**Prof. of Computer Science:
What is a kiss? It looks to be an undefined variable.

**Prof. of Statistics:
Kiss is an event whose probability depends on the
vital statistics of 36-24-36.


A UNC student named Jill calls her friend Linda,
Linda picks up the phone.

Jill says "Do ya wanna go to the mall with me?"
Linda asks "why?"
Jill replies, "I need to buy cosmetics"
Linda asks "why"
Jill replies "Well, my english prof says,
'I have a make-up exam on monday "


Diary of a new UNC grad wife -

Wednesday: I decided to serve rice and found a recipe which said,
"Wash thoroughly before steaming the rice." So I heated some
water and took a bath before steaming the rice. Sounded kinda
silly in the middle of the week. I can't say it improved the rice any.


Antelope: How she married my Uncle.


A UNC student is driving a Porsche. She sees another UNC student with
Porsche that has broken down on the side of the road. She stops to ask
what's wrong.

The owner of the broken Porsche said, "I just had a look under the hood,
well, while I was driving somebody had stolen the engine."

The other said, "Oh, don't worry, I have a spare one in the back of my


Roe V. Wade


The left just seems to get more excited about anything
when death is on the table. I don't know what it is, whether
it's disaster death or war death or society deciding we're going
to off some of our fellow citizens, they get ginned up about it, really
get excited about the death aspect. But, but, you start talking about life
and somehow they just don't have as much interest in that, as though
it is enlightened to understand that it's some people's duty to die and
get out of the way, and that not everybody has a right to life. It
depends on what somebody else wants. So I am continually
amazed at these people.


All Wet Word Quiz

Match up the correct meanings:

1. atoll (n.) - A: coral reef encircling a lagoon. B: steep
cliff. C: sound of a ship's bell. D: fishing net.

2. tack (v.) - A: to harvest. B: alter direction. C: drift.
D: lose speed.

3. corolla (n.) - A: reddish coral. B: undersea cave.
C: tidal wave. D: flower petals.

4. littoral (adj.) - relating to A: a fish's diet.
B: breathing apparatus. C: ship cargo. D: the seashore.

5. gestate (v.) - A: to grow. B: carry during pregnancy.
C: approach. D: swim in formation.

6. estuary (n.) - A: where ocean meets river. B: deep-sea
predator. C: ocean bed. D: lighthouse.

7. floe (n.) - A: unit of tidal measure. B: type of whale.
C: floating ice sheet. D: air-tank mouthpiece.

8. pelagic (adj.) - relating to A: ancient sea creatures.
B: big waves. C: the open sea. D: seaweed.

9. scuttle (v.) - A: to float. B: sink. C: cut precisely.
D: dive.

10. frond (n.) - A: microscopic ocean plant. B: large tidal
pool. C: endangered shellfish. D: large leaf.

11. halyard (n.) - A: rope that raises sail. B: ship's
kitchen. C: anchor chain. D: veteran sailor.

12. mutate (v.) - A: to relocate. B: turn suddenly.
C: change. D: eat indiscriminately.

13. piscatory (adj.) - relating to A: plant life. B: fish or
fishing. C: scuba gear. D: beach sand.

14. regenerate (v.) - A: to add new traits. B: use twice.
C: produce anew. D: eat one's own young.

15. osmosis (n.) - A: prehistoric fish. B: how coral
reproduces. C: movement of water molecules. D: steady loss
of appetite.

16. kelp (n.) - A: tiniest shark. B: dolphin sound. C: knot
used by sailors. D: type of seaweed.



Preparing For The Mahdi

Recently, the leaders of six nations, including the United States and Great
Britain, met to discuss Iran's restarting its nuclear research program. To quote
Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, Iran's actions "crossed the threshold."

What threshold? The threshold between actions that are irritating or worrisome
and those that keep you up at night. This is especially true of Iran if you
understand the religious -- and, I would say, scary -- vision that shapes
Iranian President Ahmadinejad's decisions.

Iran's president is not only a devout Shiite Muslim; he is also what is known as
a Mahdaviat. The term means "one who believes in and prepares for the Mahdi."
The Mahdi, also known as the "Twelfth Imam," is the Shiite equivalent of a
messiah: "the restorer of religion and justice who will rule before the end of
the world."

For Ahmadinejad, preparing for the Mahdi has included "secretly [instructing]
the [Tehran] city council to build a grand avenue to prepare for the Mahdi," the
building of a special mosque dedicated to the cult of the Mahdi, and
construction of a railroad line to transport pilgrims there.

And his "preparation" is not limited to actions within Iran: When he addressed
the UN, Ahmadinejad prayed for God to "hasten the emergence of . . . the
Promised One . . . that will fill this world with justice and peace."

By "peace," he does not mean an Isaiah-like "peaceable kingdom." As political
scientist John von Heyking has noted, some Mahdaviats go beyond believing that
the Mahdi will "return to save the world when it had descended into chaos." Some
of them believe that they can hasten that process by more chaos; and there is
good reason to suspect that Iran's president is one of these.

If this sounds familiar, it ought to: In my book KINGDOMS IN CONFLICT,
I wrote
about a fictitious evangelical American president who learns about a plot to
blow up the Mosque on the Dome of the Rock. While he knows that this will lead
to an all-out war in the Middle East, he hesitates because his beliefs tell him
that this will hasten Christ's return. The results of his hesitation are

I am not the only one who has noticed the parallels. Ross Douthat of the
ATLANTIC MONTHLY wrote that no Christian, regardless of eschatology,
thinks God
is commanding him to nuke Tel Aviv. Nor is he hosting Holocaust-
conferences as Ahmadinejad is.

What's more, from the start Christianity, unlike Islam, has distinguished
between the two kingdoms: God's and man's. That is why Augustine wrote the CITY
OF GOD. And that is why I wrote my book describing the two kingdoms, titled
KINGDOMS IN CONFLICT. But there's no such distinction in Islam.

Ahmadinejad's beliefs and his call for the destruction of Israel make Iran's
nuclear program even more ominous. And it would be the height of folly for the
West to regard his carefully chosen words as mere hyperbole or bombast for
internal Iranian consumption. It also ought to make us wonder what people like
British Foreign Secretary Jack Straw are thinking about when Straw says that we
should not "rush" to impose sanctions. Iran is a ticking time bomb.

As Richard Weaver noted, ideas have consequences, and the sooner world leaders
understand this, the better we'll all sleep.



Answering Islam


Jesus loves Muslims!!!



Neptune's moon Triton is the coldest place in the solar system,
a surface temperature of -235 degrees Celsius (-390 degrees
Fahrenheit). As cold as it is, there are active volcanoes on Triton

in which the erupting liquid is frigidly cold liquid nitrogen. At Triton's
surface, nitrogen normally exists as frozen ice. But
under the surface,
where Triton is heated by slow radioactive decay
of its rocks, nitrogen
melts into a liquid. When the liquid heats up
still further, it boils and
erupts through the surface, spewing
evaporating liquid nitrogen high
into space. See Genesis 1 for
more creation details. Triton is one of
the few moons in the solar system that has an
atmosphere and clouds.
The clouds, seen by Voyager 2, are evidence
of Triton's volcanoes.

According to evolutionary ideas Neptune should not exist!


The image “http://www.bljinfo.com/photos/man-writing.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Dear Friends,

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ,
he is a new creation; the old has
gone, the new has come!

Sincerely Yours,

2C 5

* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That H Enjoys" Below * * *

* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That Howdy Enjoys" Below * * *

December 26   January 02   January 09   January 16   January 23   January 30   February 06   February 13   February 20   February 27   March 06   March 13   March 20   March 27   April 03   April 10   April 17   April 24   May 01   May 08   May 15   May 22   May 29   June 05   June 19   June 26   July 03   July 10   July 17   July 24   July 31   August 07   August 21   August 28   September 04   September 11   September 18   September 25   October 02   October 09   October 16   October 23   October 30   November 06   November 13   November 20   November 27   December 04   December 11   December 18   December 25   January 01   January 08   January 15   January 22   January 29   February 05   February 12   February 19   December 30  

Jesus and The Da Vinci Code

How Can I Know God???

Tales of Narnia

Answering Islam

The Da Vinci Code

A Short Look At Six World Religions

Bible - God's Word in different languages...

Bible Study Info

Christian Web Info

Don't Be Left Behind

For The University Crowd

Hard Questions Answered

How to become a Christian

Mr. Contoversial

Great For Kids

Stories For Kids

Bible Knowledge Challenge

The Young Earth Club

Who Is Jesus???

Christian Apologetics

Christian Web Info

God Bless The USA

Great Christians In History

History of American Christianity

Bible Instructions


Dr. Ben Haden

Bible Search Tools

Kids For Truth

Lincoln - A Christian

Mission To America

One Place For Learning

Our Daily Bread

President Lincoln

Red Skelton's Pledge of Allegiance

Intellectual Takeout

Evangelical Viewpoint

Dr. John Vernon McGee

Insight For Living

Turning Point

Outstanding Bible Teacher

Dr. Tony Evans

Listen To The Bible

Is Jesus God?

Great Bible Teaching

*America - Why I Love Her - Big John Wayne*

The Church & Israel

How To Become A Christian

*Watch The Jesus Movie*


Your very own library

Muhammad or Jesus???

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 1

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 2

Christian Women

Is Jesus God?

Statement Of What Howdy Believes!!!

Bible Crosswords

Great Bible Teacher

All About Cults

Religion Comparison

The Relationship of the Church to Israel

Just For Guys

Church History

***Watch The Jesus Movie***
{Many Languages}

Music That Ho Enjoys

God Bless America - Kate Smith

Military Music

Boston Pops: God Bless America

This Land Is Your Land

Blue Moon

Say A Prayer

Hawaii Five O


The Battle Of New Orleans

Beverly Hillbillies

Indiana Jones

James Bond



Mission Impossible

Peter Gunn


Singing In The Rain

Star Wars

Top Gun

Peggy Sue



Chuck Berry

Rock Around The Clock

Dueling Guitars

Blueberry Hill

A Taste Of Honey - clip

(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco - clip

Take The 'A' Train - clip

Hello, Dolly! - clip

Peggy Sue - clip

Theme From Peter Gunn - clip

Song from Moulin Rouge


Ebb Tide

Tara's Theme from Gone with the Wind

Around the World in 80 Days

Breakfast at Tiffany's


The Way We Were

You Do Something to Me



A Foggy Day



Arrivederci Roma

Theme from Moulin Rouge II

Stardust - Big Band



Rhapsody in Blue

Sleepy Lagoon

My Foolish Heart

Lisbon Antigua

La Mer

April in Portugal

Because of You

Poor People of Paris

Unchained Melody

Stranger on the Shore


Maple Leaf Rag

Voices of Spring

Emperor Waltz

Radetzky March

Water Music (Excerpt) George Frideric Handel

Finale - William Tell Overture

Overture - My Fair Lady

The Rain in Spain

The Lonely Bull - Herb Alpert

Tijuana Taxi - Herb Alpert

The Happy Whistler

So Rare

Mona Lisa

Ghost Riders in the Sky

Walk, Don't Run

Wonderland by Night

Canadian Sunset

Blue Tango

The Happy Wanderer

Down Yonder

Midnight in Moscow

Crazy Medley


That's for Me

Quiet Village

Harbor Lights

Dueling Banjoes II

Autumn Leaves

My Foolish Heart

Don't Know Much






Close To You

Rainy Days & Mondays

Sing A Song

Yesterday Once More

We've Only Just Begun

Goodbye To Love

Only You

As Time Goes By

As Time Goes By II

As Time Goes By - Original

After Loving

San Francisco

Stranger In Paradise

Mrs. Howdy

Rags To Riches

The Good Life

Hello Dolly

All Of Me

Thank Heaven For Little Girls

Beyond The Sea

Everybody Loves

Return To Me

That's Amore

Autumn Leaves

Love Me With All Your Heart

If I Give My Heart To You

Autumn Leaves II

Autumn Leaves III

See The USA

My Prayer

You Always Hurt

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

Love Me Tender

Its Now Or Never

Old Shep

Dont Be Cruel

When I Fall In Love

When I Fall In Love II

When I Fall In Love III

A Fool Such As I

You'll Never Know


I'm Yours

Wish You Were Here

Lady Of Spain


It's Magic

Secret Love

This Magic Moment

My Prayer

Twilight Time

Great Pretender

Harbor Lights

Little Darlin'


No Other Love

Magic Moments

Till The End Of Time

Dont Let The Stars

Overture - Barber of Seville

Back In The Saddle

You Always Hurt

When I Fall

When A Man

True Love



In The Mood

A Taste Of Honey

The Lonely Bull

Lollipops And Roses

This Guys In Love With You

What Now My Love

Three Coins In The Fountain

You've Gotta Have Heart


Stranger In Paradise II

Love Is...


Georgia On My Mind

Sentimental Over You

Thanks For The Memories

Too Young


Never On Sunday

Yellow Rose Of Texas


My Little Corner

Speak Low

Moments To Remember


Be My Love

Embassy Waltz


A Certain Smile

Chances Are

Not For Me To Say

Stranger On The Shore

I'll Be Seeing You

Cherry Pink


Moonlight Serenade

Last Date

Naughty Lady

Til I Kissed You

All I Have To Do Is Dream

Dixie Land Band

Ghost Riders In The Sky

The Happy Wanderer


Santa Catalina

Band Of Gold

Auld Lang Syne

The Wayward Wind

P.S. I Love You

Harbor Lights

Ebb Tide

Lime Light

Green Door

My Heart Cries

Down Yonder

Silvana Mangano Anna

Does Your Chewing Gum?

Grand Night For Singing

Purple People Eater

Orange Blossom Special

I'll Get By

'Til Then

Katie At UNC

Love Letters

As Time Goes By

Cheek To Cheek

Mission Impossible

The Way You Look Tonight


Glad To Be An American

Battle Hymn Of The Republic

How Great Thou Art

Have Thine Own Way

Beyond The Sunset

Amazing Grace

He's Got The Whole World

Peace In The Valley

How Great Thou Art II

Stars & Stripes Forever

Tennessee Waltz

Beverly Hillbillies Theme

El Paso

Happy Trails

Big John

Sixteen Tons

Which Doctor?

Wonderful! Wonderful!



The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Mr. Sandman

Bad Leroy

Only The Lonely


Magnificent 7

Magnificent 7 - II


I Walk The Line

God loves you so much that He died for you!!!


Click Here

Verse of the Day

* * * Four important things to KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.

D I S C L A I M E R If someone should ask if it's legal to download songs
found on various non-commercial sites, such as this one.

Well, I'm neither a lawyer nor a technician,
and I've begun to wonder if it was legal for
us to tape music off the radio back when
tape recorders first came into being.

And were we committing a crime when we recorded
a movie shown on TV with our VCRs? And was it
really legal to buy a dual-deck recorder for the
express purpose of duplicating cassettes?

My answer to all of the above is, "I don't know."

Nonetheless, here is a formal statement in
some kind of legalize that appears to apply
to this kind of file availability:

The songs on this site are copyrighted by their respective artists and are placed here
for evaluation purposes only. No profits or sales are made on this site from their use.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?