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We have -
Moved To:
http://professor-howdy.blogspot.com/















The E.Newspaper
By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D.
A.P.E., N.U.T.

************************
Check Out Comments -
Humor + Letters From Readers
Add Something Yourself
************************

Friday

 

Riddles 12.16.5

.


1) You may praise your good fortune
and curse all you hate,
Yet I rule all your chaos and gamble your fate.
By some I'm avoided by others I'm game,
Called by fat or slim, my meanings the same.

2) Of all the words; we are four
All rhyming down to the core

One is what a pen is for
Another's brightness can't be more

The third is a toy soaring through the wind
The last happens late, you must comprehend

Now tell me what these four words are
And you just might go really far.

3) My first is at the beginning of race,
My second at the end of face.
My third is at the beginning of a word
in a question,
The fourth is in a word for "to question".
My fifth is in race, yet not in ace,
And for the last, I am starting done.

4) Take away my first letter and I remain the same.
Take away my second letter and I remain unchanged.
Take away my third letter and I am unchanged.
Take away all my letters and I am still exactly the same.
What am I?

ANSWERS!!!






 

Lassie Matrix Video

.


Watch Video!!!






 

UNC INVENTIONS

.


A freezer for Eskimos.
AC adapter for solar calculators.
Air-Bag Motorcycle jacket.
Battery powered battery charger.
Battery-operated nuclear power plants.
Blinker Fluid.
Braille Drivers' Manual
Cat flap for the fridge







 






 






 

Can You Tell A Book By Its Author?

.


French Population.....................Francis Crowded
Downpour! .................................Wayne Dwops
Cloning .......................................Ima Dubble
Irish Flooring .............................Lynn O'Leum
Personal House Construction ....Bill Jerome Home
Unemployed ...............................Anita Job
Off to Market ..............................Tobias A. Pigg
Holmes Does it Again .................Scott Linyard Home
Alone IV .....................................Eddie Buddyhome
Carroll .......................................Alison Wonderland Leo
Tolstoy ......................................Warren Peace Neither
Borrower ...................................Nora Lender Bee
Chef ...........................................Sue Flay
Tight Situation .........................Leah Tard
Why Cars Stop ..........................M. T. Tank
Wind in the Willows ................Russell Ingleaves
Look Younger ...........................Fay Slift
Mountain Climbing ..................Andover Hand
It's Springtime! ........................Theresa Green
No! ............................................Kurt Reply






 

Deer John Letter







 

Merry Christmas
From Howdy














...............Click on Pic to enlarge!

.......................






 


A man and his girlfriend were out to
dinner one night.

The waiter tells them the night's special
is almond chicken and fresh fish.

"The chicken sounds good; I'll have that,"
the woman says.

The waiter nods. "And the vegetable?" he asks.

"Oh, he'll have the fish," she replies.






 

Are You Gift-Wrapping Porn?

.


An article by Daniel Weiss in the WASHINGTON TIMES
titled:
"Christmas, Porn, and Children" points out that many
of the most
popular gadgets this year "come with ready access
to hardcore pornography."



For instance, there's the Apple Video iPod, capable of downloading
and storing
up to 150 hours of video. Porn industry giants such as
HUSTLER, PENTHOUSE,
and PLAYBOY, writes Dan, are form -
ulating content for the new handheld as we
speak. And he says
another porn site, called SuicideGirls, "reportedly sold 1 million

downloads of nude models within a week of the video iPod's debut."



Then there are the new high-tech camera and video phones,
which are capable
of wireless Internet access without filtering
software. These phones can capture
and store up to three mega -
bytes of digital images. And the Sony PlayStation
Portable is
also Internet-ready and can be used to download pornographic

pictures and video without any filtering from any wireless technology.



Appallingly, porn producers designed and released films for
Playstation Portable
within weeks of its launch. And keep in
mind, PlayStation is intended for
children.

MORE!!!







 

When Prejudice Becomes A Disease



Is hate a disease? Some psychiatrists think so. This was
the subject of a recent
WASHINGTON POST article, titled
"Psychiatry Ponders Whether Extreme Bias Can Be
an Illness."
The title suggests the ominous implications.

MORE!!!






 

Mormon Doctrine Of God

.
The image “http://www.mikiemetric.cc/USAPics/Buildings/MormonCathedral-DC_Bldg.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Mormons consider themselves to be Christian,
but many question this claim.

MORE!!!






Thursday

 

Merry Christmas -
Happy Birthday To The King

















 



Q: What do you call a UNC golfer with an I.Q. of 125?
A: A foursome.



UNC Psch. Profs






 
http://www.inetours.com/San_Diego/Images/StHistPrk/School-Int_6066.jpg

In case of terrorist nuclear attack, the federal ruling
against prayer in schools will be temporarily canceled.






 

Christmas Virus Warning

.




MORE!!!






 


A musician is hot and tired after the gig, so he pulls
into the 7-11 to get a cold drink. While he's buying
his slurpee, he suddenly realizes that he spaced
out -- the accordion is in the back seat, in full view!

He rushes out of the store... but it's too late. Someone
has already broken the car window.......

........and left another accordion.






 

BUYING BREAD

.


We learn something new every day! If you
buy bread, look at the twist-tie at the end
of the loaf.

When you go to buy bread in the grocery
store, have you ever wondered which is
the freshest? You probably "squeeze"
for freshness or softness.

Did you know that bread is delivered
fresh to the stores five days a week?
These days are Monday, Tuesday,
Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. Each
day has a different color twist-tie on
the bread. They are:

Monday----Blue
Tuesday----Green
Thursday---Red
Friday------White
Saturday----Yellow

The colors go alphabetically by color as shown
above. This makes it very easy to remember.







 






 


We work like a horse.
We eat like a pig.
We like to play chicken.
You can get someone's goat.
We can be as slippery as a snake.
We get dog tired.
We can be as quiet as a mouse.
We can be as quick as a cat.
Some of us are as strong as an ox.
People try to buffalo others.
Some are as ugly as a toad.
We can be as gentle as a lamb.
Sometimes we are as happy as a lark.
Some of us drink like a fish.
We can be as proud as a peacock.
A few of us are as hairy as a gorilla.
You can get a frog in your throat.
We can be a lone wolf.
But I'm having a whale of a time!







 

Overworked!!!

.


For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep and
too much pressure from my job, but now I found out the real
reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked.

The population of this country is 237 million.



104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do
the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal
government, leaving 19 million to do the work. 2.8 million are
in the Armed Forces, which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.
Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State
and City Governments and that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals, leaving
1,212,000 to do the work. Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.



That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me.

And you're sitting at your computer reading jokes.

Howdy

The image “http://www.pepjobs.com/images/needpep/overworked2_r1_c1.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.






 

Got A Question?

.


Maybe a librarian can help! Need some help
during exam time? QuestionPoint
is an alliance
of libraries.


The service is accessed through local libraries’
Web sites. If the local library can’t answer the
question, or is closed, the query will be passed
on to a facility with expertise in that area.
There is no charge to the user.

MORE!!!






 

“Peace on earth, good will toward men,” they used to say this time of year.
Now the prevalent line seems to be, “I’m offended!”

A very small, but very loud, group of people have decided to further erect
a wall of separation between spirituality and daily life through a secularist
agenda to change Christmas into anything but a religious holiday. On talk
radio, one atheist proclaimed, “The [winter] solstice is the reason for the
season!”







 
http://www.worldcpa.com/sites/site-5/images/general/man%20airport.jpg

Dear Friends,

Bear with each other and forgive whatever
grievances
you may have against one another.
Forgive as the Lord
forgave you.

Yours,
Paul

C3






 

Howdy's Computer

.






 

Hollywood Destroys Friendship

.


The critics will celebrate Brokeback Mountain, and we can now
expect a flood of similar themes, stories, and depictions. Society
at large
is corrupted by the normalization of homosexuality and
the bonds of normal
male friendships are weakened, if not destroyed.
Remember all this as
Hollywood prepares to celebrate its latest
cultural "achievement."

















* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That H Enjoys" Below * * *

* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That Howdy Enjoys" Below * * *

December 26   January 02   January 09   January 16   January 23   January 30   February 06   February 13   February 20   February 27   March 06   March 13   March 20   March 27   April 03   April 10   April 17   April 24   May 01   May 08   May 15   May 22   May 29   June 05   June 19   June 26   July 03   July 10   July 17   July 24   July 31   August 07   August 21   August 28   September 04   September 11   September 18   September 25   October 02   October 09   October 16   October 23   October 30   November 06   November 13   November 20   November 27   December 04   December 11   December 18   December 25   January 01   January 08   January 15   January 22   January 29   February 05   February 12   February 19   December 30  

Jesus and The Da Vinci Code

How Can I Know God???

Tales of Narnia

Answering Islam

The Da Vinci Code

A Short Look At Six World Religions

Bible - God's Word in different languages...

Bible Study Info

Christian Web Info

Don't Be Left Behind

For The University Crowd

Hard Questions Answered

How to become a Christian

Mr. Contoversial

Great For Kids

Stories For Kids

Bible Knowledge Challenge

The Young Earth Club

Who Is Jesus???

Christian Apologetics

Christian Web Info

God Bless The USA

Great Christians In History

History of American Christianity

Bible Instructions

RBC

Dr. Ben Haden

Bible Search Tools

Kids For Truth

Lincoln - A Christian

Mission To America

One Place For Learning

Our Daily Bread

President Lincoln

Red Skelton's Pledge of Allegiance

Intellectual Takeout

Evangelical Viewpoint

Dr. John Vernon McGee

Insight For Living

Turning Point

Outstanding Bible Teacher

Dr. Tony Evans

Listen To The Bible

Is Jesus God?

Great Bible Teaching

*America - Why I Love Her - Big John Wayne*

The Church & Israel

How To Become A Christian

*Watch The Jesus Movie*

Fireworks

Your very own library

Muhammad or Jesus???

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 1

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 2

Christian Women

Is Jesus God?

Statement Of What Howdy Believes!!!

Bible Crosswords

Great Bible Teacher

All About Cults

Religion Comparison

The Relationship of the Church to Israel

Just For Guys

Church History

***Watch The Jesus Movie***
{Many Languages}





Music That Ho Enjoys



God Bless America - Kate Smith

Military Music

Boston Pops: God Bless America

This Land Is Your Land

Blue Moon

Say A Prayer

Hawaii Five O

LawOrder

The Battle Of New Orleans

Beverly Hillbillies

Indiana Jones

James Bond

Jaws

Magnum

Mission Impossible

Peter Gunn

Rocky

Singing In The Rain

Star Wars

Top Gun

Peggy Sue

Downtown

Elvis

Chuck Berry

Rock Around The Clock

Dueling Guitars

Blueberry Hill

A Taste Of Honey - clip

(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco - clip

Take The 'A' Train - clip

Hello, Dolly! - clip

Peggy Sue - clip

Theme From Peter Gunn - clip

Song from Moulin Rouge

Malagueña

Ebb Tide

Tara's Theme from Gone with the Wind

Around the World in 80 Days

Breakfast at Tiffany's

Charade

The Way We Were

You Do Something to Me

SWonderful

Adios

A Foggy Day

Amor

Anna

Arrivederci Roma

Theme from Moulin Rouge II

Stardust - Big Band

Bolero

Brazil

Rhapsody in Blue

Sleepy Lagoon

My Foolish Heart

Lisbon Antigua

La Mer

April in Portugal

Because of You

Poor People of Paris

Unchained Melody

Stranger on the Shore

Solace

Maple Leaf Rag

Voices of Spring

Emperor Waltz

Radetzky March

Water Music (Excerpt) George Frideric Handel

Finale - William Tell Overture

Overture - My Fair Lady

The Rain in Spain

The Lonely Bull - Herb Alpert

Tijuana Taxi - Herb Alpert

The Happy Whistler

So Rare

Mona Lisa

Ghost Riders in the Sky

Walk, Don't Run

Wonderland by Night

Canadian Sunset

Blue Tango

The Happy Wanderer

Down Yonder

Midnight in Moscow

Crazy Medley

Tequila

That's for Me

Quiet Village

Harbor Lights

Dueling Banjoes II

Autumn Leaves

My Foolish Heart

Don't Know Much

I WALK THE LINE

EL PASO

TENNESSEE WALTZ

STAND BY YOUR MAN

ON THE ROAD AGAIN

Close To You

Rainy Days & Mondays

Sing A Song

Yesterday Once More

We've Only Just Begun

Goodbye To Love

Only You

As Time Goes By

As Time Goes By II

As Time Goes By - Original

After Loving

San Francisco

Stranger In Paradise

Mrs. Howdy

Rags To Riches

The Good Life

Hello Dolly

All Of Me

Thank Heaven For Little Girls

Beyond The Sea

Everybody Loves

Return To Me

That's Amore

Autumn Leaves

Love Me With All Your Heart

If I Give My Heart To You

Autumn Leaves II

Autumn Leaves III

See The USA

My Prayer

You Always Hurt

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

Love Me Tender

Its Now Or Never

Old Shep

Dont Be Cruel

When I Fall In Love

When I Fall In Love II

When I Fall In Love III

A Fool Such As I

You'll Never Know

Fascination

I'm Yours

Wish You Were Here

Lady Of Spain

CanadianSunset

It's Magic

Secret Love

This Magic Moment

My Prayer

Twilight Time

Great Pretender

Harbor Lights

Little Darlin'

Wanted

No Other Love

Magic Moments

Till The End Of Time

Dont Let The Stars

Overture - Barber of Seville

Back In The Saddle

You Always Hurt

When I Fall

When A Man

True Love

Sincerely

Sweetheart

In The Mood

A Taste Of Honey

The Lonely Bull

Lollipops And Roses

This Guys In Love With You

What Now My Love

Three Coins In The Fountain

You've Gotta Have Heart

HeartOfMyHeart

Stranger In Paradise II

Love Is...

Unforgettable

Georgia On My Mind

Sentimental Over You

Thanks For The Memories

Too Young

Because

Never On Sunday

Yellow Rose Of Texas

Windy

My Little Corner

Speak Low

Moments To Remember

HernandosHideaway

Be My Love

Embassy Waltz

Misty

A Certain Smile

Chances Are

Not For Me To Say

Stranger On The Shore

I'll Be Seeing You

Cherry Pink

Downtown

Moonlight Serenade

Last Date

Naughty Lady

Til I Kissed You

All I Have To Do Is Dream

Dixie Land Band

Ghost Riders In The Sky

The Happy Wanderer

Lollipops

Santa Catalina

Band Of Gold

Auld Lang Syne

The Wayward Wind

P.S. I Love You

Harbor Lights

Ebb Tide

Lime Light

Green Door

My Heart Cries

Down Yonder

Silvana Mangano Anna

Does Your Chewing Gum?

Grand Night For Singing

Purple People Eater

Orange Blossom Special

I'll Get By

'Til Then

Katie At UNC

Love Letters

As Time Goes By

Cheek To Cheek

Mission Impossible

The Way You Look Tonight

Frenesi

Glad To Be An American

Battle Hymn Of The Republic

How Great Thou Art

Have Thine Own Way

Beyond The Sunset

Amazing Grace

He's Got The Whole World

Peace In The Valley

How Great Thou Art II

Stars & Stripes Forever

Tennessee Waltz

Beverly Hillbillies Theme

El Paso

Happy Trails

Big John

Sixteen Tons

Which Doctor?

Wonderful! Wonderful!

Misty

Gina

The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Mr. Sandman

Bad Leroy

Only The Lonely

Pachelbel

Magnificent 7

Magnificent 7 - II

Rawhide

I Walk The Line


God loves you so much that He died for you!!!



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Verse of the Day




* * * Four important things to KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.




D I S C L A I M E R If someone should ask if it's legal to download songs
found on various non-commercial sites, such as this one.

Well, I'm neither a lawyer nor a technician,
and I've begun to wonder if it was legal for
us to tape music off the radio back when
tape recorders first came into being.

And were we committing a crime when we recorded
a movie shown on TV with our VCRs? And was it
really legal to buy a dual-deck recorder for the
express purpose of duplicating cassettes?

My answer to all of the above is, "I don't know."

Nonetheless, here is a formal statement in
some kind of legalize that appears to apply
to this kind of file availability:

The songs on this site are copyrighted by their respective artists and are placed here
for evaluation purposes only. No profits or sales are made on this site from their use.

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