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We have -
Moved To:
http://professor-howdy.blogspot.com/















The E.Newspaper
By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D.
A.P.E., N.U.T.

************************
Check Out Comments -
Humor + Letters From Readers
Add Something Yourself
************************

Friday

 

Speeding???







 

Who's Fault?







 







 

Blog Tribes

.


In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the
ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists
call this a form of primitive self-expression. In America we call it golf.






 

Blog Sub

.


Q: How do you sink a submarine full of UNC grads?
A: Knock on the door.








 

Baby Porcupine

.


Q: What did the baby porcupine say when it backed into the cactus?
A: Is that you, Mother?








 

Blending


(Tks: Phil)






 

Can Evolution & Creationism Mix???

.
The image “http://www.zipcon.net/~purtill/pigs-and-toasters/galaxy.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The conflict between the worldview of Christianity and the worldview
of evolutionary naturalism represents a clash between mutually exclusive
understandings of reality. This may be the ultimate culture war of our time,
because it underlines fundamental and mutually exclusive visions of the path
toward truth.


MORE!!!






 

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Thursday

 

Blog Worry







 

Blog Home







 

Floral Flag



Between the fields where the flag is planted, there are
9+ miles of flower fields that go all the way to the ocean.
The flowers are grown by seed companies. It's a beautiful
place, close to Vandenberg AFB.

Check out the dimensions of the flag. The Floral Flag is
740 feet long and 390 feet wide and maintains the proper
Flag dimensions, as described in Executive Order #10834.
This Flag is 6.65 acres and is the first Floral Flag to
be planted with 5 pointed Stars, comprised of White
Larkspur. Each Star is 24 feet in diameter; each Stripe
is 30 feet wide. This Flag is estimated to contain more
than 400,000 Larkspur plants, with 4-5 flower stems each,
for a total of more than 2 million flowers. You can drive
by this flag on

V Street south of Ocean Ave.in Lompoc, CA.






 

Is This God's Judgment?




New Orleans underwater...








 

Sports Quotes

.


"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."
- Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh

"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is
a guy like Norman Einstein."
- Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann 1996



"You guys line up alphabetically by height."
-Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach

"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."
-Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach.



Lou Duva, Veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of
Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning
regardless of what time it is."

1992- Pat Williams, Orlando Magic general manager, on his team's 7-27
record: "We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As general
manager, I just can't figure out where else to play."



1982 - Chuck Nevitt , North Carolina State basketball player,
explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice:
"My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an
uncle or an aunt."



1981 - Tommy Lasorda , Dodger manager, when asked what terms
Mexican-born pitching sensation Fernando Valenzuela might settle for
in his upcoming contract negotiations: "He wants Texas back."

1991 -Steve Spurrier, Florida football coach, telling Gator fans that
a fire at Auburn's football dorm had destroyed 20 books: "But the real
tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet."



1986 - Jim Finks, New Orleans Saints G.M., when asked after a loss
what he thought of the refs: "I'm not allowed to comment on lousy
officiating."

1991 - Alan Kulwicki, stock car racer, on racing Saturday nights as
opposed to Sunday afternoons: "It's basically the same, just darker."







 

Bedlam Definition

.
The image “http://www.watsoncrombie.com/unc_nc_state_football/rush_field.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

Bedlam describes a noisy lack of order, a scene of confusion.
Near
synonyms include: chaos, pandemonium, hubbub and uproar.
Example: "When the referee awarded the penalty kick, complete
bedlam
broke out among the home team's fans."

The word is a corruption of Bethlehem the popular name for the
Hospital of St. Mary Bethlehem in London, England, which was used
to
house the mentally ill. In 1403, the asylum became Britain's first
to exclusively serve this purpose.

Bedlam is capitalized when used as a noun describing a lunatic
asylum. It was also used in the early 16th century to refer to an
insane person. Madmen were labeled Tom O'Bedlams. In Shakespeare's
King Lear, Edgar disguises himself as a Tom O'Bedlam. See also
Democratic Party.






 

Magic Lamp

.



One night a UNC student found a magic lamp, picked it up,
rubbed it and a Genie appeared.
"Your wish is my command," said the Genie.
"Well, there is one thing," the UNC student said.
"Just name it," said the Genie.

"It's those UNC jokes. They are so demeaning to UNC grads
everywhere, not just to me. I would like for UNC jokes to stop."
"Consider it done," said the Genie. "UNC jokes shall be stricken
from the minds of humans everywhere. But surely there is something
that I could do just for you."

"There is one more thing. But it's really small, and not worth your time,"
said the UNC student.

"Name it. Please," said the Genie.

"It's those M&M's," said the UNC student. "They're so hard to peel."








 

Katrina Buses



Why weren't those buses sent street by street to pick up people before the storm?”
Ask the N.O. mayor??? He was urged by the President BEFORE Katrina struck
to evacuate his city. If he had listened, as many as 10,000 people would have
survived as well as 2000 buses...






 

God in the Storm



Click on Pic!!!







Wednesday

 

Does God So Love the World???

.


Does God love YOU???

ANSWER!!!







 

Computer Dating

.


A UNC student gave up on Computer
Dating after she was stood up by two
mainframes, a mini, and a laptop.







 

Blog Hearing Aid

.


A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing
aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art."

"Really," answered the neighbor. "What kind is it?"

"Twelve thirty."






 

The P.C. Answer

.


The applicant for life insurance was finding it difficult to
fill out the application.

The salesman asked what the trouble was, and the man said
that he couldn't answer the question about the cause of death
of his father.

The salesman wanted to know why. After some embarrassment the
client explained that his father had been hanged.

The salesman pondered for a moment. "Just write: 'Father was
taking part in a public function when the platform gave way.'"






 

Tallest Dam

.
The image “http://unesco.uiah.fi/water/material/image18.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The world's tallest dam is the partly-constructed Rogun Dam in
Tajikistan, a tiny country in the jagged mountains between China
and Afghanistan. At 1100 feet tall (336 meters, about as high as a
100-story building) this earth and rock dam overtops its nearby
neighbor the Nurek Dam, which is the world's second tallest at 985
feet (300 meters).

The unfinished Rogun Dam was severely damaged by floods in the early
1990s and is currently undergoing major repairs, so its reservoir is
not yet filled. The completed Nurek Dam produces electricity and
water for irrigation.

The image “http://www.sengers.ch/wallis/dixence/03.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The third tallest dam is Switzerland's Grand Dixence, at 285 meters.
The tallest dam in the United States is the Oroville Dam in northern
California, at 755 feet (230 meters). Oroville is 16th on the world list.

The image “http://orovillerelicensing.water.ca.gov/graphics/p_thermalito%20diversion%20dam3.gif” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.






 

THE SIX PHASES OF A PROJECT

.


1. Enthusiasm
2. Disillusionment
3. Panic
4. Search for the Guilty
5. Punishment of the Innocent
6. Praise and Honor for the Non-Participants








 

Blog Wedding

.


Q: What happens when two bullets get married?
A: They have a little BB.








 

Running Out

.


There are a lot of folks that can't understand how
we ran out of oil here in the USA.

Well, here's the answer: It's simple.........nobody bothered
to check the oil. Didn't know we were getting low. And of
course the reason for that is geographical. Most of the oil
is offshore or in Texas, Alaska and Oklahoma, and all the
dipsticks
are the liberals in the U.S. Senate.








 

Was Hurricane Katrina 'Intelligent Design?'

.


NPR Senior News Analyst, Daniel Schorr, observed that
President Bush had “staked out a non-position” on the
debate between evolution and intelligent design. Bush
had said that “both sides ought to be properly taught
in the schools of America.”


Then, with manifest scorn, Schorr linked the devastation
of Hurricane Katrina with the concept of intelligent design:
“[Bush] might well have reflected that, if this was the result
of intelligent design, then the designer has something to
answer for.”

MORE!!!







Tuesday

 

Blog Question

.


Q: What did the mayonnaise say to the fridge?
A: Close the door, I'm dressing!








 

Blog Statement

.


We work like a horse.
We eat like a pig.
We like to play chicken.
You can get someone's goat.
We can be as slippery as a snake.
We get dog tired.
We can be as quiet as a mouse.
We can be as quick as a cat.
Some of us are as strong as an ox.
People try to buffalo others.
Some are as ugly as a toad.
We can be as gentle as a lamb.
Sometimes we are as happy as a lark.
Some of us drink like a fish.
We can be as proud as a peacock.
A few of us are as hairy as a gorilla.
You can get a frog in your throat.
We can be a lone wolf.
But I'm having a whale of a time!







 

Blog Harvard U.

.


A young man had just graduated from Harvard and was so excited
just thinking about his future. He gets into a taxi and the
driver says, "How are you on this lovely day?"

"I'm the Class of 2005 & just graduated from Harvard and I just
can't wait to go out there and see what the world has in store for me."

The driver looks back to shake the young man's hand and says,
"Congratulations, I'm Mitch Class of 1979."






 

Answers To UNC Vocabulary Test

.


Paradox \par'-u-doks\: two physicians

Parasites \par'-uh-sites\: what you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

Pharmacist \farm'-uh-sist\: a helper on the farm

Polarize \po'-lur-ize\: what penguins see with

Primate \pri'-mat\: removing your spouse from in front of the TV

Relief \ree-leef'\: what trees do in the spring

Rubberneck \rub'-er-nek\: what you do to relax your wife

Seamstress \seem'-stres\: describes 250 pounds in a size six

Selfish \sel'-fish\: what the owner of a seafood store does

Subdued \sub-dood'\: like, a guy, like, works on one of those, like,
submarines, man

Sudafed \sood'-a-fed\: bringing litigation against a government official






 

Blog Bank

.


A UNC student went into a bank to withdraw some money.

"Can you identify yourself?" asked the bank clerk.

The student pulls a mirror out of her handbag, looks into
it and says, "Yes, it's me alright."






 

Blog Husband

.


A young lady visited the matchmaker for marriage
and requested - "I'm looking for a spouse. Can you please
help me to find a suitable one?"

The marriage officer said, "You're requirements please."

"Well, let me see. Needs to be good looking, polite,
humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, good at singing and
dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home
during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me
interesting stories when I need companion for conversation
and be silent when I want to rest."

The matchmaker listened carefully and replied,

"I understand. You need a television."






 

Blog Fall

.


A civil servant is badly hurt falling down the stairs of the Post
Office in Atlanta. He is taken to the hospital where he remains
in a coma for several days.

Finally, an eye opens and his doctor tells him:

"My friend, I have bad news and I have good news. First of all,
you'll never be able to work again..."

"No," muttered the injured bureaucrat. "What's the bad news?"








 

Riddles For 9.6.5



Riddles:


1) I sizzle like bacon,
I am made with an egg.
I have plenty of backbone,
But I lack a good leg.
I peel layers like onions,
But I still remain whole.
I am as long as a flagpole.
Yet I fit in a hole.

What am I?


2) I rule over everything
I lay mountains low
I dethrone all kings
and kingdoms overthrow
I am measured
yet have no substance
I exist but can't be touched
I am everywhere yet I am nothing
you live by my standard day by day
can you find me? Well, it's simple--
most everyone carries me to work everyday


3) You are going to mail a letter, but the only information
you have is listed below. What would his address be?

WOOD
JOHN
MASS

4) What has roots that nobody sees, and is taller than trees.
Up, up it goes, and yet it never grows.
What is it?

5) These ten fictitious names are all rearrangements of the
names of famous people. For example, if Sheila O'Norton
was in the list, you would discover that this was really
Horatio Nelson is disguise. Can you discover who everyone
really is?

a) Jamie Braser f) Jon Hasket
b) Frank Cardise g) Fred Hyron
c) Fred Colatis h) Mark Larx
d) Alfie Dondee i) Helmut Tarrin
e) Fidel Haltor j) June Seatan

6) I sit and face you and you stare right back.
You say nothing to me for I do not understand,
but you understand all of what I say if you want to.
I never move but I can make you feel any number of
different emotions but mostly none at all,
then you leave without saying goodbye.

What am I?

7) A man gets out of jail and goes to a nearby hotel where he leaves
a considerable sum of money. He then moves his car to another
hotel where he leaves a lesser sum of money. What is he doing???

8) I can bring a smile to your face,
a tear to your eye,
or even a thought to your mind;
but I can't be seen...

9) What type of room has neither window, door, ceiling, nor floor?

ANSWERS HERE!!!















* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That H Enjoys" Below * * *

* * * Great Archives Here - - - - "Music That Howdy Enjoys" Below * * *

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Jesus and The Da Vinci Code

How Can I Know God???

Tales of Narnia

Answering Islam

The Da Vinci Code

A Short Look At Six World Religions

Bible - God's Word in different languages...

Bible Study Info

Christian Web Info

Don't Be Left Behind

For The University Crowd

Hard Questions Answered

How to become a Christian

Mr. Contoversial

Great For Kids

Stories For Kids

Bible Knowledge Challenge

The Young Earth Club

Who Is Jesus???

Christian Apologetics

Christian Web Info

God Bless The USA

Great Christians In History

History of American Christianity

Bible Instructions

RBC

Dr. Ben Haden

Bible Search Tools

Kids For Truth

Lincoln - A Christian

Mission To America

One Place For Learning

Our Daily Bread

President Lincoln

Red Skelton's Pledge of Allegiance

Intellectual Takeout

Evangelical Viewpoint

Dr. John Vernon McGee

Insight For Living

Turning Point

Outstanding Bible Teacher

Dr. Tony Evans

Listen To The Bible

Is Jesus God?

Great Bible Teaching

*America - Why I Love Her - Big John Wayne*

The Church & Israel

How To Become A Christian

*Watch The Jesus Movie*

Fireworks

Your very own library

Muhammad or Jesus???

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 1

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 2

Christian Women

Is Jesus God?

Statement Of What Howdy Believes!!!

Bible Crosswords

Great Bible Teacher

All About Cults

Religion Comparison

The Relationship of the Church to Israel

Just For Guys

Church History

***Watch The Jesus Movie***
{Many Languages}





Music That Ho Enjoys



God Bless America - Kate Smith

Military Music

Boston Pops: God Bless America

This Land Is Your Land

Blue Moon

Say A Prayer

Hawaii Five O

LawOrder

The Battle Of New Orleans

Beverly Hillbillies

Indiana Jones

James Bond

Jaws

Magnum

Mission Impossible

Peter Gunn

Rocky

Singing In The Rain

Star Wars

Top Gun

Peggy Sue

Downtown

Elvis

Chuck Berry

Rock Around The Clock

Dueling Guitars

Blueberry Hill

A Taste Of Honey - clip

(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco - clip

Take The 'A' Train - clip

Hello, Dolly! - clip

Peggy Sue - clip

Theme From Peter Gunn - clip

Song from Moulin Rouge

Malagueña

Ebb Tide

Tara's Theme from Gone with the Wind

Around the World in 80 Days

Breakfast at Tiffany's

Charade

The Way We Were

You Do Something to Me

SWonderful

Adios

A Foggy Day

Amor

Anna

Arrivederci Roma

Theme from Moulin Rouge II

Stardust - Big Band

Bolero

Brazil

Rhapsody in Blue

Sleepy Lagoon

My Foolish Heart

Lisbon Antigua

La Mer

April in Portugal

Because of You

Poor People of Paris

Unchained Melody

Stranger on the Shore

Solace

Maple Leaf Rag

Voices of Spring

Emperor Waltz

Radetzky March

Water Music (Excerpt) George Frideric Handel

Finale - William Tell Overture

Overture - My Fair Lady

The Rain in Spain

The Lonely Bull - Herb Alpert

Tijuana Taxi - Herb Alpert

The Happy Whistler

So Rare

Mona Lisa

Ghost Riders in the Sky

Walk, Don't Run

Wonderland by Night

Canadian Sunset

Blue Tango

The Happy Wanderer

Down Yonder

Midnight in Moscow

Crazy Medley

Tequila

That's for Me

Quiet Village

Harbor Lights

Dueling Banjoes II

Autumn Leaves

My Foolish Heart

Don't Know Much

I WALK THE LINE

EL PASO

TENNESSEE WALTZ

STAND BY YOUR MAN

ON THE ROAD AGAIN

Close To You

Rainy Days & Mondays

Sing A Song

Yesterday Once More

We've Only Just Begun

Goodbye To Love

Only You

As Time Goes By

As Time Goes By II

As Time Goes By - Original

After Loving

San Francisco

Stranger In Paradise

Mrs. Howdy

Rags To Riches

The Good Life

Hello Dolly

All Of Me

Thank Heaven For Little Girls

Beyond The Sea

Everybody Loves

Return To Me

That's Amore

Autumn Leaves

Love Me With All Your Heart

If I Give My Heart To You

Autumn Leaves II

Autumn Leaves III

See The USA

My Prayer

You Always Hurt

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

Love Me Tender

Its Now Or Never

Old Shep

Dont Be Cruel

When I Fall In Love

When I Fall In Love II

When I Fall In Love III

A Fool Such As I

You'll Never Know

Fascination

I'm Yours

Wish You Were Here

Lady Of Spain

CanadianSunset

It's Magic

Secret Love

This Magic Moment

My Prayer

Twilight Time

Great Pretender

Harbor Lights

Little Darlin'

Wanted

No Other Love

Magic Moments

Till The End Of Time

Dont Let The Stars

Overture - Barber of Seville

Back In The Saddle

You Always Hurt

When I Fall

When A Man

True Love

Sincerely

Sweetheart

In The Mood

A Taste Of Honey

The Lonely Bull

Lollipops And Roses

This Guys In Love With You

What Now My Love

Three Coins In The Fountain

You've Gotta Have Heart

HeartOfMyHeart

Stranger In Paradise II

Love Is...

Unforgettable

Georgia On My Mind

Sentimental Over You

Thanks For The Memories

Too Young

Because

Never On Sunday

Yellow Rose Of Texas

Windy

My Little Corner

Speak Low

Moments To Remember

HernandosHideaway

Be My Love

Embassy Waltz

Misty

A Certain Smile

Chances Are

Not For Me To Say

Stranger On The Shore

I'll Be Seeing You

Cherry Pink

Downtown

Moonlight Serenade

Last Date

Naughty Lady

Til I Kissed You

All I Have To Do Is Dream

Dixie Land Band

Ghost Riders In The Sky

The Happy Wanderer

Lollipops

Santa Catalina

Band Of Gold

Auld Lang Syne

The Wayward Wind

P.S. I Love You

Harbor Lights

Ebb Tide

Lime Light

Green Door

My Heart Cries

Down Yonder

Silvana Mangano Anna

Does Your Chewing Gum?

Grand Night For Singing

Purple People Eater

Orange Blossom Special

I'll Get By

'Til Then

Katie At UNC

Love Letters

As Time Goes By

Cheek To Cheek

Mission Impossible

The Way You Look Tonight

Frenesi

Glad To Be An American

Battle Hymn Of The Republic

How Great Thou Art

Have Thine Own Way

Beyond The Sunset

Amazing Grace

He's Got The Whole World

Peace In The Valley

How Great Thou Art II

Stars & Stripes Forever

Tennessee Waltz

Beverly Hillbillies Theme

El Paso

Happy Trails

Big John

Sixteen Tons

Which Doctor?

Wonderful! Wonderful!

Misty

Gina

The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Mr. Sandman

Bad Leroy

Only The Lonely

Pachelbel

Magnificent 7

Magnificent 7 - II

Rawhide

I Walk The Line


God loves you so much that He died for you!!!



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Verse of the Day




* * * Four important things to KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.




D I S C L A I M E R If someone should ask if it's legal to download songs
found on various non-commercial sites, such as this one.

Well, I'm neither a lawyer nor a technician,
and I've begun to wonder if it was legal for
us to tape music off the radio back when
tape recorders first came into being.

And were we committing a crime when we recorded
a movie shown on TV with our VCRs? And was it
really legal to buy a dual-deck recorder for the
express purpose of duplicating cassettes?

My answer to all of the above is, "I don't know."

Nonetheless, here is a formal statement in
some kind of legalize that appears to apply
to this kind of file availability:

The songs on this site are copyrighted by their respective artists and are placed here
for evaluation purposes only. No profits or sales are made on this site from their use.

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