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The E.Newspaper By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D. A.P.E., N.U.T.
************************ Check Out Comments - Humor + Letters From Readers Add Something Yourself ************************
"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." - Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh
"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." - Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann 1996
"You guys line up alphabetically by height." -Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach
"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle." -Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach.
Lou Duva, Veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is."
1992- Pat Williams, Orlando Magic general manager, on his team's 7-27 record: "We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play."
1982 - Chuck Nevitt , North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt."
1981 - Tommy Lasorda , Dodger manager, when asked what terms Mexican-born pitching sensation Fernando Valenzuela might settle for in his upcoming contract negotiations: "He wants Texas back."
1991 -Steve Spurrier, Florida football coach, telling Gator fans that a fire at Auburn's football dorm had destroyed 20 books: "But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet."
1986 - Jim Finks, New Orleans Saints G.M., when asked after a loss what he thought of the refs: "I'm not allowed to comment on lousy officiating."
1991 - Alan Kulwicki, stock car racer, on racing Saturday nights as opposed to Sunday afternoons: "It's basically the same, just darker."