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We have -
Moved To:

The E.Newspaper
By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D.
A.P.E., N.U.T.

Check Out Comments -
Humor + Letters From Readers
Add Something Yourself



A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate your
relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law better
than I like mine!"

Wise Advice from Children

"Everyone has feelings, except for snakes and principals."
- Donna Maria G, age 9

"Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and the world
laughs at you." - Rob P, age 8

"If life gives you nothing but lemons, make up a better
shopping list for it." - Steven B, age 8

"Moses came down with the Ten Amendments, which
were God's Bill of Wrongs." - Susie F., age 7

"Doctors automatically know what's wrong with you.
They have a sick sense." - Beau M., age 10

"My dog had worms. I think he was going fishing."
- Emma B., age 4
Ten things Only Women Understand

10. Cats' facial expressions
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds
7. Fat clothes
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time
5. The difference between beige, off-white, and eggshell
4. Cutting your bangs to make them grow - HUH??
3. Eyelash curlers
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made
Actual 6th Grade History Test Answers

1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all
wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert. The climate
of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.

2. Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea, where
they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any
ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten
commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada.

3. Solomon had three hundred wives and seven hundred

4. The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and
without them we wouldn't have history. The Greeks also had myths.
A myth is a female moth.

5. Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around
giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an
overdose of wedlock. After his death, his career suffered a
dramatic decline.

6. In the Olympic games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled
biscuits, and threw the Java.

7. Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul.
The Ides of March murdered him because they thought he was
going to be made king. Dying, he gasped out: "Tee hee, Brutus."

8. Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak and was canonized
by Bernard Shaw.

9. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries.
Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible. Another important
invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a
historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started
smoking. Sir Francis Drake Circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.
Spoken by Jesus: "...whoever wants to save his life will lose
it, but whoever loses his life for Me will find it."
--Matthew 16:25
A Dog's Speaks His/Her Mind

**Treat me kindly, my beloved master, for no heart in all the
world is more grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.

**Do not break my spirit with a stick, for though I should lick
your hand between the blows, your patience and understanding will
more quickly teach me the things you would have me do.

**Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music,
as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your
footstep falls upon my waiting ear.

**When it is cold and wet please take me inside...for I am now a
domesticated animal, no longer used to bitter elements..... and I
ask no greater glory than the privilege of sitting at your feet
beside the hearth...though had you no home, I would rather follow
you through ice and snow than rest upon the softest pillow in
the warmest home in all the land...for you are my master...and
I am your devoted worshipper.

**Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for although I should not
reproach you were it dry, I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst.

**Feed me clean food, that I may stay well, to romp and play and do
your bidding, to walk by your side, and stand ready, willing and
able to protect you with my life, should your life be in danger.

**And, beloved master, should the Great Master see fit to
deprive me of my health, do not turn me away from you.
Rather hold me gently in your arms as skilled hands grant me
the merciful boon of eternal rest...and I will leave you knowing
with the last breath I drew, my fate was ever safest in your hands.
Author Unknown

Not desiring to be reborn anywhere soon, and neither willing to believe
Islam is a peaceful nor a violent religion (or anything analogous for
christianity), in fact desiring -but this is irrelevant- that people think
for themselves or at least have some more doubts, i would like to ask you
to please, please, please finally remove me from this annoying maillist.

Imagine, not being entangled in the conundrums (conundra if you please) of
understanding everything in a fixed frame of thought involving a good god,
a lot of misery, some ancient texts and a clergy with a history that
perhaps not in size, but in intensity rivals that of described characters
in your T&H. Appreciate (___, you see, i'm concerned about your
well-being) the ambiguity of human nature, of nature in general.

And you can still make (very american) jokes. O, please unsubscribe me.

Doeke Hekstra (rockefeller.edu)
"What I AM"-A Paid Ad in the Washington Post By a Republican Businessman-Truth!
bullet Summary of the eRumor
A long and passionate defense of being a Republican written by a businessman and placed in the Washington Post newspaper.

bullet The Truth
The ad appeared in the Washington Post on 10/20/04.
It was written and paid for by George J. Esseff, Sr,
Reprints are offered at the web site http://www.whatiam.net/ where there is also a link to email the author.
A real example of the eRumor as it has appeared on the Internet:

What I Am!

$104,655.60 Ad in the Washington Post

Here is someone with the money to fund a rebuttal to what Howard Dean,
Democratic National Committee Chairman, said recently that many Republican
have never done an honest day's work in their life. The following full page
ad was placed in the Washington Post by a businessman named George J.
Esseff, Sr. He paid $104,655.60 to run the ad and only did it because he is
sick and tired of the way that "the rich" are portrayed by liberals these
days. It is a great read.


Maybe you're a Republican?

In today's America ask a growing number of high school and college students,
their teachers and professors, the self-anointed media elite and/or hard
working men and women of all ethnicities, the question, "What is a
Republican?" and you'll be told ".. a rich, greedy, egotistical individual,
motivated only by money and the desire to accumulate more and more of it, at
the expense of the environment, the working poor....and all whom they

I am a Republican - And I am none of those things....and I don't know any
Republicans who are!

WHAT I AM first and foremost, is a loving husband of some 52 plus years, the
father of four and an American who's proud of his country...and his
country's heritage

WHAT I AM is the grandson of immigrants who risked every-thing, including
their lives and those of their children, to escape tyranny in search of

WHAT I AM is a man who grew up during the Depression and witnessed first
hand the effects of the Stock Market crash and the soup lines that followed.
I watched as both my parents and grand parents, who had very little
themselves, share what food they had with a half dozen other families, who
had even less.

WHAT I AM is someone who worked his way through college by holding down
three and four jobs at a time and then used that education to build a better

WHAT I AM is a husband who at age 24 started his own business for the
"privilege" of working 60, 70 and 80 hours a week, risking everything I had
including my health, in search of a better life for myself and my loved

WHAT I AM is a businessman whose blood, sweat and tears....and plenty of
them..., made it possible for me to provide a secure living not only for my
family and myself, but also for literally hundreds of my employees
throughout the years. Employees who in turn were able to buy their own
homes, raise their own families and give back to their communities and their

WHAT I AM is a man who believes in God; a God who has blessed this
country... and all for which it stands.

WHAT I AM is someone who knows, if you doubt miracles exist in today's
world, you need only to look into the face of those who received them....and
the eyes of those who give them.

WHAT I AM is an American who's proud that his President embraces a belief in
God; proud of a President who understands, as "politically incorrect" as it
may be, there is evil in this world and for the security and safety of all
freedom loving people everywhere, it must be confronted...and it must be

WHAT I AM is an American who takes comfort in the knowledge that our
President refuses to allow decisions concerning the very safety and security
of this nation, to be governed by the political whims of foreign

WHAT I AM is tired of hearing from leading Democrats who see only negativity
in America; racism in her people; class warfare in her society and
"political incorrectness" in her character.

WHAT I AM is a former democrat who now understands that it is the soldier
and not the reporter that guarantees us our freedoms of press, speech and

WHAT I AM is a man who believes in the sanctity of life. A man who is
repulsed by the pandering of the political left for votes, at the expense of
the unborn.

WHAT I AM is a husband and father who believes in the sanctity of marriage
and the preservation of the family unit.

WHAT I AM is a ex-movie goer who is repulsed by those insecure, socially
inept, elementary thinking, ego-inflated "entertainers" who have appointed
themselves "experts" in the fields of national security and geo-politics and
then use their forum to attack this nation, its leaders and its
actions....much to the delight and encouragement of our enemies.

WHAT I AM is an American who understands the difference between "censorship"
and "choice." Evidently, these individuals do not, because when these same
"celebrities" receive public ridicule for their offensive actions, the first
thing they yell is "censorship." What they seem incapable of understanding
is...the right of free speech and dissent is shared equally by those
offended...as well as those who offend. I support and will continue to
support those films and performers whom I choose to and refuse to support
those I don't. It is my right as an American a right I will continue to
enthusiastically exercise.

WHAT I AM is a voter, tired of politicians who ever time their voting
records are subjected to public scrutiny, try to divert attention from their
political and legislative failures by accusing their opponents of "attack
ads" and "negative campaigning"....and the news media who allow them to get
away with it.

WHAT I AM is a Catholic who loves his God and his Faith....and who's been
taught to respect all religions whose teachings are based in love, peace and
charity. As such, I am embarrassed and ashamed of those individuals in both
private and public life whose decisions and actions are devoid of any sense
of character or morals; individuals who are only driven by what's best for
them....rather than what's right... often times at the expense of
many....including our national security.
WHAT I AM is a realist who understands that the terrorist attack that
murdered hundreds of innocent Russian children could have occurred here, in
our heartland. That's why I sincerely believe America needs now, more than
ever, a President who sees with a clear and focused vision and who speaks
with a voice when heard by both friend and foe alike is understood,
respected and believed.

WHAT I AM is eternally grateful to Ronald Reagan for having the bravery to
speak out against Communism and the courage of his convictions in leading
the fight to defeat it; and George W. Bush for the vision, courage,
conviction and leadership he has shown in America's war on terrorism amidst
both the constant and vicious, personal and political attacks both he and
his family are made to endure.

WHAT I AM is a human being, full of numerous faults and failures, but a man
nonetheless who though not always successful has continually strived to do
"what's right" instead of "what's easy." A man who is challenging the
religious leaders of all faiths, to not only preach to their congregations
the fundamentals of "what's right" and "what's wrong," but to also then hold
them accountable for their actions in both the public and private sectors.

WHAT I AM is disgusted with the Courts who on one hand call the murder of a
pregnant woman a "double homicide," but then refer to the abortion of her
baby as "pro-choice".

WHAT I AM is someone deeply troubled by a political party which embraces a
candidate whose primary "leadership" qualities center around his protesting
of the Vietnam war and his labeling the honorable men and women who fought
in it, (50,000 of whom gave their lives in that action), as rapists, and war
criminals (John Kerry). That same political party then stepped forward this
year to block the appearance of a true Vietnam war hero, retired Admiral and
former United States Senator, Jeremiah Denton, (a man who spent seven years
and seven torturous months in a North Vietnam prison), from speaking before
an open session of the California legislature as part of that state's 4th of
July celebration. The reason Democrats gave for refusing to allow this
American hero to speak before their state legislature was because of the
"conservative" nature of his views. As an American, that troubles me
deeply....as well it should you. (Are you listening Mr. D?)

WHAT I AM is a man who feels the need to spend, ONE HUNDRED
DOLLARS ($104, 655.60, tax paid) of his own money, to purchase this
advertisement, in order to set the story straight. Some may say this money
would have been better spent feeding the world's poor. At the risk of
sounding self-serving, as an American and as a Republican, for the last
six decades of my life, I have done exactly that...and more. Following
the examples of my parents and grand parents, I have used my earnings
to feed the poor, shelter the homeless, provide housing for the elderly
and medical care for the sick.....and continue to do so...and I'm not
alone in that work.

WHAT I AM is someone who is paying for this announcement at my sole expense
in hopes of opening the eyes of those led blindly by ill-informed elements
of our great nation, who, through either ignorance, or malicious intent,
repeatedly attack and belittle those of us who belong to a political party
that holds true to the belief, "The rights of the governed, exceed the power
of the government." For those interested, I am speaking only as a
tax-paying individual who is in no way associated with the Republican
National Committee, nor with any of its directors, or delegates.

WHAT I AM is a man who understands, "the American way of life" is a message
of self-empowerment for all.

WHAT I AM is an American who is grateful that our nation gives each of us
the opportunity of self-determination and the right to benefit from the
fruits of self achievement.

WHAT I AM is an American who wants to preserve that way of life for all who
seek it.

WHAT I AM is blessed to be an American.... and proud to be a Republican.
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Jesus and The Da Vinci Code

How Can I Know God???

Tales of Narnia

Answering Islam

The Da Vinci Code

A Short Look At Six World Religions

Bible - God's Word in different languages...

Bible Study Info

Christian Web Info

Don't Be Left Behind

For The University Crowd

Hard Questions Answered

How to become a Christian

Mr. Contoversial

Great For Kids

Stories For Kids

Bible Knowledge Challenge

The Young Earth Club

Who Is Jesus???

Christian Apologetics

Christian Web Info

God Bless The USA

Great Christians In History

History of American Christianity

Bible Instructions


Dr. Ben Haden

Bible Search Tools

Kids For Truth

Lincoln - A Christian

Mission To America

One Place For Learning

Our Daily Bread

President Lincoln

Red Skelton's Pledge of Allegiance

Intellectual Takeout

Evangelical Viewpoint

Dr. John Vernon McGee

Insight For Living

Turning Point

Outstanding Bible Teacher

Dr. Tony Evans

Listen To The Bible

Is Jesus God?

Great Bible Teaching

*America - Why I Love Her - Big John Wayne*

The Church & Israel

How To Become A Christian

*Watch The Jesus Movie*


Your very own library

Muhammad or Jesus???

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 1

Why The U.S.A. Is At War - 2

Christian Women

Is Jesus God?

Statement Of What Howdy Believes!!!

Bible Crosswords

Great Bible Teacher

All About Cults

Religion Comparison

The Relationship of the Church to Israel

Just For Guys

Church History

***Watch The Jesus Movie***
{Many Languages}

Music That Ho Enjoys

God Bless America - Kate Smith

Military Music

Boston Pops: God Bless America

This Land Is Your Land

Blue Moon

Say A Prayer

Hawaii Five O


The Battle Of New Orleans

Beverly Hillbillies

Indiana Jones

James Bond



Mission Impossible

Peter Gunn


Singing In The Rain

Star Wars

Top Gun

Peggy Sue



Chuck Berry

Rock Around The Clock

Dueling Guitars

Blueberry Hill

A Taste Of Honey - clip

(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco - clip

Take The 'A' Train - clip

Hello, Dolly! - clip

Peggy Sue - clip

Theme From Peter Gunn - clip

Song from Moulin Rouge


Ebb Tide

Tara's Theme from Gone with the Wind

Around the World in 80 Days

Breakfast at Tiffany's


The Way We Were

You Do Something to Me



A Foggy Day



Arrivederci Roma

Theme from Moulin Rouge II

Stardust - Big Band



Rhapsody in Blue

Sleepy Lagoon

My Foolish Heart

Lisbon Antigua

La Mer

April in Portugal

Because of You

Poor People of Paris

Unchained Melody

Stranger on the Shore


Maple Leaf Rag

Voices of Spring

Emperor Waltz

Radetzky March

Water Music (Excerpt) George Frideric Handel

Finale - William Tell Overture

Overture - My Fair Lady

The Rain in Spain

The Lonely Bull - Herb Alpert

Tijuana Taxi - Herb Alpert

The Happy Whistler

So Rare

Mona Lisa

Ghost Riders in the Sky

Walk, Don't Run

Wonderland by Night

Canadian Sunset

Blue Tango

The Happy Wanderer

Down Yonder

Midnight in Moscow

Crazy Medley


That's for Me

Quiet Village

Harbor Lights

Dueling Banjoes II

Autumn Leaves

My Foolish Heart

Don't Know Much






Close To You

Rainy Days & Mondays

Sing A Song

Yesterday Once More

We've Only Just Begun

Goodbye To Love

Only You

As Time Goes By

As Time Goes By II

As Time Goes By - Original

After Loving

San Francisco

Stranger In Paradise

Mrs. Howdy

Rags To Riches

The Good Life

Hello Dolly

All Of Me

Thank Heaven For Little Girls

Beyond The Sea

Everybody Loves

Return To Me

That's Amore

Autumn Leaves

Love Me With All Your Heart

If I Give My Heart To You

Autumn Leaves II

Autumn Leaves III

See The USA

My Prayer

You Always Hurt

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

Love Me Tender

Its Now Or Never

Old Shep

Dont Be Cruel

When I Fall In Love

When I Fall In Love II

When I Fall In Love III

A Fool Such As I

You'll Never Know


I'm Yours

Wish You Were Here

Lady Of Spain


It's Magic

Secret Love

This Magic Moment

My Prayer

Twilight Time

Great Pretender

Harbor Lights

Little Darlin'


No Other Love

Magic Moments

Till The End Of Time

Dont Let The Stars

Overture - Barber of Seville

Back In The Saddle

You Always Hurt

When I Fall

When A Man

True Love



In The Mood

A Taste Of Honey

The Lonely Bull

Lollipops And Roses

This Guys In Love With You

What Now My Love

Three Coins In The Fountain

You've Gotta Have Heart


Stranger In Paradise II

Love Is...


Georgia On My Mind

Sentimental Over You

Thanks For The Memories

Too Young


Never On Sunday

Yellow Rose Of Texas


My Little Corner

Speak Low

Moments To Remember


Be My Love

Embassy Waltz


A Certain Smile

Chances Are

Not For Me To Say

Stranger On The Shore

I'll Be Seeing You

Cherry Pink


Moonlight Serenade

Last Date

Naughty Lady

Til I Kissed You

All I Have To Do Is Dream

Dixie Land Band

Ghost Riders In The Sky

The Happy Wanderer


Santa Catalina

Band Of Gold

Auld Lang Syne

The Wayward Wind

P.S. I Love You

Harbor Lights

Ebb Tide

Lime Light

Green Door

My Heart Cries

Down Yonder

Silvana Mangano Anna

Does Your Chewing Gum?

Grand Night For Singing

Purple People Eater

Orange Blossom Special

I'll Get By

'Til Then

Katie At UNC

Love Letters

As Time Goes By

Cheek To Cheek

Mission Impossible

The Way You Look Tonight


Glad To Be An American

Battle Hymn Of The Republic

How Great Thou Art

Have Thine Own Way

Beyond The Sunset

Amazing Grace

He's Got The Whole World

Peace In The Valley

How Great Thou Art II

Stars & Stripes Forever

Tennessee Waltz

Beverly Hillbillies Theme

El Paso

Happy Trails

Big John

Sixteen Tons

Which Doctor?

Wonderful! Wonderful!



The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Mr. Sandman

Bad Leroy

Only The Lonely


Magnificent 7

Magnificent 7 - II


I Walk The Line

God loves you so much that He died for you!!!


Click Here

Verse of the Day

* * * Four important things to KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.

D I S C L A I M E R If someone should ask if it's legal to download songs
found on various non-commercial sites, such as this one.

Well, I'm neither a lawyer nor a technician,
and I've begun to wonder if it was legal for
us to tape music off the radio back when
tape recorders first came into being.

And were we committing a crime when we recorded
a movie shown on TV with our VCRs? And was it
really legal to buy a dual-deck recorder for the
express purpose of duplicating cassettes?

My answer to all of the above is, "I don't know."

Nonetheless, here is a formal statement in
some kind of legalize that appears to apply
to this kind of file availability:

The songs on this site are copyrighted by their respective artists and are placed here
for evaluation purposes only. No profits or sales are made on this site from their use.

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