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The E.Newspaper
By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D.
A.P.E., N.U.T.
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Friday
Elementronics
The heaviest element known to science is Managerium.
This element has no protons or electrons, but has a nucleus
composed of 1 neutron, 2 vice-neutrons, 5 junior vice-neutrons,
25 assistant vice-neutrons, and 125 junior assistant
vice-neutrons all going round in circles.
Managerium has a half-life of three years, at which time it does
not decay but institutes a series of reviews leading to
reorganization.
Its molecules are held together by means of the exchange of tiny
particles known as morons.
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