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The E.Newspaper
By Dr. Howdy, Ph.D.
A.P.E., N.U.T.
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Tuesday
Tech FAQ
Q. There are two shift keys, which should I use?
A. Avoid unnecessary wear on either shift key by
alternating between the two. Keep track of your usage
of each key so that you press them in equal amounts.
Your keyboard may be equipped with a small notepad;
you should use this to make little tally marks in two
columns for each time you shift. Remember, it's better
to go to a little trouble than wind up with a broken
shift key.
Q. If I press the shift key at the wrong time, or too
many times, will my computer explode?
A. No. Well, generally no. Not unless you are using
a NEC laptop. Or VT100 terminal emulation. But even
then, hardly ever. Really, don't worry about it. Forget
I mentioned it. Just type softly. Move along, next
question.
Q. Why are the shift keys bigger than the other keys?
A. They aren't. This is simply an optical illusion. Just
as the moon appears much larger when it is close
to the horizon, your shift keys look larger because
of their proximity to other keys. To verify this, go
out in a large field at night with your keyboard, place
it in an upright position, and view it from a distance
of 200 yards. Sure enough, the keys all look the same
size!
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