We have -
Moved To:
http://professor-howdy.blogspot.com/

*"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,"
declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my
ways higher than your ways and My thoughts higher than your thoughts. As
the rain & snow come down from heaven and do not return to it without
watering the earth & making it flourish, so that it yields seed for the
sower and bread... --Is. 55
 

Typical UNC Grad's Resume:


My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it,
so they gave me the axe.
After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it.
Mainly because it was a so-so job.
Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was exhausting.
I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.
Then I tried to be a chef--figured it would add a little spice to my
life but I just didn't have the thyme.
Finally, I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patients.
Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.
I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
Thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but
the work was just too draining.
I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes but I was fired because I wasn't up to it.
So then I got a job in a gymnasium (work-out-center), but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
Next, I found being an electrician interesting, but the work was shocking.
After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a
historian until I realized there was no future in it.
My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was
always the same old grind.
You got any ideas? I'm opened for suggestions .........maybe you have
something that WORKS..........because I don't.
 

GOLFER, n.

1. A person who yells "fore," takes six, and puts down five;

2. A guy who has the advantage over a fisherman - he doesn't have to
bring home anything when he brags he had a great day.
 

She Was an Algore supporter & She ...

1. Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

2. Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a
slope.

3. Can't work in a pharmacy because the bottles won't fit into the
typewriter.

4. Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the
box said "2 to 4 years".

5. Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

6. Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button.

7. When asked what the capital of California was, answered "C."

8. Burnt her nose bobbing for french fries.

9. Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per
pound and she weighed 125.

10. Can't make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water won't fit into those
little packets.

11. Hates M&M's because they are so hard to peel.

12. Got hurt while raking leaves; fell out of the tree.

13. Changes the baby's diaper only once a month because the label said
"good up to 20 pounds."

14. What goes "vroom-screech-vroom-screech', etc? A Democrat at a
flashing red light.

15. Two Democrats are trying to get into their car using a coat hanger
then one says, "Hurry, it's starting to rain and the top is down.
 

Here's my strategy on the Cold War: We win, they lose."

- Ronald Reagan

"The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help."

- Ronald Reagan

"The trouble with our liberal friends is not that they're ignorant: It's just that they know so much that isn't so."

- Ronald Reagan

"Of the four wars in my lifetime none came about because the U.S. was too strong."

- Ronald Reagan

"I have wondered at times about what the Ten Commandment's would have looked like

if Moses had run them through the U.S. Congress."

- Ronald Reagan


"The taxpayer: That's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination."

- Ronald Reagan



"Government is like a baby: An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other."

- Ronald Reagan

"If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under."

- Ronald Reagan



"The nearest thing to eternal life we will ever see on this earth is a government program."

- Ronald Reagan

"I've laid down the law, though, to everyone from now on about anything that happens:

no matter what time it is, wake me, even if it's in the middle of a Cabinet meeting."

- Ronald Reagan


"It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession.

I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first."

- Ronald Reagan

"Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases:

If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it."

- Ronald Reagan


"Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book."
- Ronald Reagan

"No arsenal, or no weapon in the?arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women.

- Ronald Reagan

Bob D.